The Toolkit for the Modern Woman

Showing up to yourself in 2020

December 6th, 2019 by

So here we are…the thing we have all anticipated for an entire year but yet when it arrives, it is also clouded by a sense of dread. And that is…December! The disbelief is not so much about we are at the end of the year but it is a symbol that forces you to really […]

Own your productivity

December 3rd, 2019 by

I have written many articles and run master classes about how to own your Time. This includes tools about dealing with procrastination, multi-tasking (which is actually a bad thing), anxiety and spiralling thoughts, planning, prioritising – this is just a few from my toolkit.   I am a huge believer in the mantra ‘Tiny tweaks […]

Beyond the Dress - Recommended Reading 2019

Holiday Season Recommended Reading 2019

December 2nd, 2019 by

I am a huge advocate of Owning your Time off – this festive season, ditch the socials and rather energise, inspire and reinvigorate yourself with some good quality reading. Be it audio books, Kindle or old faithful paper books. I want to share with you some of my favourite books over 2019 with some key […]

Show up to your fun side

December 2nd, 2019 by

  I was swimming with my kids yesterday and my 4 year old daughter innocently said to me ‘Mommy, come and have fun with me’. I looked at her and thought ‘Ok, how do you do that?’   I asked her ‘Show me what fun is’ (because I didn’t want to be the boring mom […]

Test your assumptions

December 2nd, 2019 by

Like most of you, I used to shudder at the thought of 4am. More specifically how some people actually willingly woke up at 4am? Beyond me!   If you read my blogs regularly, you will know that exercise is really important to me.  Over the years it has started at 7am then moved earlier as […]

Own Your Self-Worth

Own Your Self-Worth

November 13th, 2019 by

I was asked to present a master class on self leadership to a new client for their team of 8 women. It was a fantastic morning and I was feeling really good… except when it came to the Q&A part of the session. Clearly I may have ruffled some feathers and was faced with some […]

Own Your Time Off

October 31st, 2019 by

Own your time off Think about the last time you took leave. Was it filled with a slight sense of dread and the self-talk went ‘this is the worst possible time to take leave’. And then you take the leave and spend the time with a heavy cloud of guilt hanging over your head worrying […]

Be Your Own Permission Agent

October 31st, 2019 by

Back in 2012, I knew I wanted to write a book that included interviews of amazing women to share their stories and insights. I didn’t know where to begin so I called Mandy Wiener, a well-known journalist. I had worked with her earlier that year on an event and reached out to her for advice. […]

Own your Happiness

October 31st, 2019 by

Dandapani is a Hindu priest, speaker on self-development and an entrepreneur. He lived as a monk for 10 years and then moved to New York City to pass on his teachings to the West. He made a profound statement saying we shouldn’t pursue happiness. What we need to do is create a lifestyle where the […]

Own your Goals

October 31st, 2019 by

I was listening to an interview with Essentialism author, Greg McKeon. He shared an interesting story of how he was in a fancy dress shop looking for a Halloween costume recently. He tried on a Star Wars Storm Trooper outfit and when he was looking in the mirror he remembered a significant childhood memory of […]


Own Your Self-Discipline

October 21st, 2019 by

I had the honour of doing a TEDx talk in December 2018. The key insight from the talk was that it’s not enough to schedule yourself into the calendar. Think about it, the key lies in showing up to yourself. If you scheduled a run at 6:30am and you don’t actually show up to yourself […]

Show up to your future self

Show Up to Your Future Self

September 18th, 2019 by

A few years ago, I came across Peter Bregman’s book called ’18 minutes’. He spoke about creating areas of focus for your life as opposed to goals. Peter suggests that we should have five areas of focus: three work related and two personal. He says ‘(Almost) everything I do must fit in one of these […]

Why You Should Seriously Rethink Exercise

Why You Should Seriously Rethink Exercise

July 7th, 2019 by

Over the last 25 years, the one constant in my life has been exercise. I’m sure at this point, you are rolling your eyes at the dread of the thought. You probably picture pain, stiffness, awkwardness, stuffy gyms and guilt (for not going). I want to offer you a different approach and hopefully by the […]

The Real Truth of Being a Working Mom

The Real Truth of Being a Working Mom

July 6th, 2019 by

Rachel is a mother, entrepreneur, wife, daughter and friend. She left the corporate world after her daughter was born as she quickly realised she was not going to achieve the flexibility she required for her daughter. She decided to go freelance and has done really well in a marketing and strategy consulting role. Recently Rachel […]

Own Your Goals

Own Your Goals

June 7th, 2019 by

Own Your Goals I was listening to an interview with Essentialism author, Greg McKeon. He shared an interesting story of how he was in a fancy dress shop looking for a Halloween costume recently. He tried on a Star Wars Storm Trooper outfit and when he was looking in the mirror he remembered a significant […]

The myth of passion

The myth of passion

May 14th, 2019 by

The myth of passion The word ‘passion’ has become a huge buzzword lately. Experts sharing their tips on how to discover your calling, your passion, your purpose for being on this planet. What I have found is that this is starting to become a destructive word. It creates this huge sense of fear – ‘what […]

Show up to yourself

What does it mean to show up to yourself?

April 26th, 2019 by

What does it mean to show up to yourself? I think we can agree on one thing, the pace feels like it gets faster by the week. We are constantly juggling between the multiple roles we play. We put everyone else’s needs ahead of our own because we’ve been conditioned as women to do this. […]

Success is a sunrise away

Success is a sunrise away

February 11th, 2019 by

Wake up earlier – you’ll never say ‘I don’t have time to’… ever again Achievers around the world swear by the motto – ‘success is a sunrise away’. Not everyone can wake up early. Our gadget-filled world has given us enough distractions to keep us awake even when we are in bed. And some of […]

Own Your Meetings

November 12th, 2018 by

I had the privilege of presenting at 2 financial conferences recently. The target audience was predominantly CFOs and leaders in the finance community. In my research, the number one time waster was – you guessed it – meetings. Here is a snap shot of the tools you can use to maximise your meetings. They are […]

Own Your Time

Own Your Time

October 9th, 2018 by

At this point in the year, we are gobsmacked that it’s October and repeatedly tell ourselves how the year has flown. But when we create days that are memorable, they seem to stick longer in our mind and it feels like time slows down just a little bit. It is simple enough to make a […]


ANXIETY = Uncertainty x Powerlessness

August 20th, 2018 by

  This equation comes from Chip Conley’s insightful book ‘Emotional Equations’. Chip believes that the product of what you don’t know (uncertainty) and what you can’t control (powerlessness) creates the emotional condition of anxiety, which is greater than the sum of its parts. Anxiety is an emotion, not a character defect. People with the greatest […]

Just Listen…

April 25th, 2018 by

I always know where my focus and head space is by the status of the wallpaper on my phone. Not quite what you were expecting to read right? So, a few months ago, I made myself a wallpaper with the word ‘Pause’. This was to remind myself to slow down, be mindful, not rush, not […]

Micro Bravery

Micro Bravery

April 11th, 2018 by

I recently listened to the Tim Ferris Show podcast with his guest Caroline Paul, who is a fire fighter talking about Micro Bravery. I absolutely love this concept! We often set ourselves huge challenges and then feel so overwhelmed by them that we don’t know where to start and maybe put them off altogether. The […]


Own Your Overwhelm

March 22nd, 2018 by

In our technologically driven world, we become more and more dependent on technology for everything. My go-to app for driving is Waze. Even if I know the route, I refer to it to view the quickest way by traffic flow, anything to scrape even those precious 5 minutes off the commute. Now have you ever […]

What is the story we tell ourselves?

What’s The Story We Tell Ourselves?

January 19th, 2018 by

Welcome to 2018, it is amazing to be here. My overarching theme for 2017 which had a massive impact on my life is ‘What is the story we tell ourselves?’ So what is the story we tell ourselves? Often this story gets moulded from childhood by our parents and teachers on what we can, can’t, […]


Newsletter: December 2017

December 12th, 2017 by

And here we are… December. We have survived what Judy Klipin calls ‘Novemberitis’. When we have Novemberitis, we are neither here nor there, don’t know if we are coming or going, aren’t fully present or engaged. We are often tired, stressed and stretched.’ So well done for surviving this odd month. And finally – rest, […]

The Four Tendencies

The Four Tendencies

November 13th, 2017 by

In my previous article on habits, I spoke about New York Times Best Selling Author, Gretchen Rubin. She has now developed ‘The Four Tendencies’ framework. In a nutshell, it distinguishes how people tend to respond to expectations: outer expectations (a deadline, a “request” from a sweetheart) and inner expectations (write a novel in your free […]

Own your Habits, Own your Time

September 26th, 2017 by

When you woke up this morning, what did you do first? Did you go to gym or check your email? What did you say to your kids on your way out the door? Which route did you drive to work? When you got to your desk, did you deal with email, chat with a colleague, […]

The Power of the Pause

The Power of the Pause

August 16th, 2017 by

The most important 5 letter word that has emerged over and over in many different forms this last few weeks for me has been the simple word – PAUSE. As Peter Bregman, author of ‘Four Seconds’ says ‘The key to success in our fast-moving world is to pause for as few as four seconds – […]

How to create a habit

My Inspirations: How to create a habit by Charles Duhigg

August 7th, 2017 by

The key to forming a new habit and making it stick is to take advantage of the 3-step neurological process that creates a habit. First, choose a cue, like leaving your running shoes by the door, then pick a reward — say, a piece of chocolate when you get home from the gym. Eventually, when […]

Seth Godin Leap First

My Inspirations: 10 Priceless Insights From Seth Godin’s “Leap First”

August 7th, 2017 by

Earlier this year, Seth Godin released a masterful audiobook called Leap First: Creating Work That Matters. I recently listened to it and wanted to share some of his most inspirational words of wisdom about art, business and life in general. Believe me when I say that anyone will benefit from hearing this book. Art is […]

My Inspirations: First, ten

August 7th, 2017 by

This is an amazing blog by marketing guru, Seth Godin for anyone who is in their own business or looking to take the plunge to start their new business. It is the new rules for marketing today… enjoy. ‘This, in two words, is the secret of the new marketing. Find ten people. Ten people who […]

Own Your Personal Brand

Own Your Personal Brand

August 7th, 2017 by

Seth Godin, marketing guru and best selling author describes your brand as ‘the promise’ you make. What do people expect of you when they engage with you? Brands that keep their promises are consistent and trustworthy. From the minute you engage with your boss, colleagues, co-workers, customer, prospect or even with the person at the […]

Own Your Ask

Own Your Ask: How to Charge for Your Time

August 7th, 2017 by

In a mentoring discussion with an entrepreneur, Laura admitted she felt uncomfortable charging people for her services. She works with expecting moms from pregnancy to post birth focusing on how to prepare them for this new journey. It is very time consuming and demanding both physically and emotionally. Laura also confessed how despite her training, […]

Own Your Podium

Own Your Podium: Part 2

July 6th, 2017 by

There is no question that your ability to communicate confidently and authoritatively is critical to your career success. Presentations are amongst your most important opportunities to make an impression, to stand out and enhance your personal brand. It’s not simply another boring meeting. Get over thinking of presentations as burdens. Just by thinking about them […]

Own Your Positive Headspace

May 31st, 2017 by

With Winter looming around the corner, our natural tendency is to start focusing on the more negative things such as the cold and dark mornings especially if you’re an early riser. Here are some tried and tested steps I incorporate into my daily routine to stay focused on the positive: Choose your thoughts The first […]

Own Your Habits – Time Blocking

April 28th, 2017 by

“You are what you repeatedly do, then achievement isn’t an action you take but a habit you forge into your life. You don’t have to seek out success. Harness the power of selected discipline to build the right habit, and extraordinary results will find you” – Gary Keller, The One Thing. Here is a great […]

Unexpected life lessons from the gym

Unexpected Life Lessons from the Gym

March 23rd, 2017 by

I started going to a gym when I was 13; I am now almost 36. I think this gives me my 10 000 hours of mastery according to Malcolm Gladwell. Here are some unexpected lessons I’ve learnt at the gym that can be applied to the real world: Own your headspace: Get your attitude about […]

Own Your Ask

Own Your Ask

March 6th, 2017 by

If there’s something you want, something you really want, such as a raise, a bigger opportunity, more responsibility, a chance to prove yourself, constructive feedback, or even a little extra help around the house, do you ask for it? Many of us don’t. Many of us live with self-limiting beliefs or we repeat disempowering stories […]

Jar of Awesome

The Jar of Awesome

February 14th, 2017 by

When things don’t go your way, “looking on the bright side” is a real test of your ability to show gratitude. No one is perfect at showing gratitude at first, but here’s an idea that can help that I learned from Tim Ferriss, author of Tools of Titan and The Four Hour Work Week. He […]

Own Your Time

Own Your Time: Part 2

December 5th, 2016 by

December is that time of year when we start getting ready to put the old behind us and start preparing for the new. It’s a time of shifting away from old and unhealthy patterns and creating space for newer, healthier practices. Use this month to start embracing these time boosting habits as part of your […]

Own Your Space

How to Make 2017 a Smashing Success Part 1: Busting Time Traps

November 2nd, 2016 by

One of the biggest complaints we hear from women in our workshops around the world is that they don’t have enough time to be everything they need to be. Every New Year starts with lofty aspirations and the best of intentions, only to careen into another yearend, leaving a tattered trail of unfinished goals and […]

Own Your Podium

Own Your Podium: Part 1

October 20th, 2016 by

There is no question that your ability to communicate confidently and authoritatively is critical to your career success. Presentations are amongst your most important opportunities to make an impression, to stand out and enhance your personal brand. It’s not simply another boring meeting. Get over thinking of presentations as burdens. Just by thinking about them […]

Own Your Habits

Own Your Habits

September 2nd, 2016 by

‘People do not decide their futures, they decide their habits and their habits decide their futures’ – F.M Alexander This is the foundation of success on which success is built – whatever that means to you. I was inspired by an article I came across on that beautifully illustrates that no matter how much […]

Own Your Space

Google yourself, your career will thank you for it

July 7th, 2016 by

Forget what people say about ‘vanity searching’ or ‘ego surfing’, to google yourself is neither about vanity nor ego. If you’re serious about your professional presence, about owning your space in the virtual world as much as you are about owning it in the physical world, googling yourself is an absolute necessity. Whether you like […]

OWN Your Space

Done is better than perfect

May 17th, 2016 by

As women, as leaders, professionals, mothers, and wives, in all the roles we play as human beings, we need to finally get it through our heads that there really is no such thing as perfect. ‘Perfect’ is not only a total myth, it’s a deeply destructive and limiting myth. There is immense satisfaction when we […]

Lori & Kids

Own your empathy: The greatest lesson I learnt from my toddler

May 17th, 2016 by

My son and I visited a friend of mine in a clinic recently. We were sitting outdoors in a communal garden area, where we met a gentleman who had recently had a traumatic and nearly fatal motorcycle accident. As a result, his nose had to be reconstructed. If you can picture it, he literally had […]

Own Your Arrival

Own Your Arrival

April 4th, 2016 by

Do you attend events regularly? Or do you plan on going to an event in future? Then this blog post is for you. I have organised many events and I have also been a guest at many events. This double role means that I understand not only what goes into planning an event, but also […]

Own your Headspace: pressing the mental pause button

February 22nd, 2016 by

Take a moment and think back to the last time you did or said something out of anger or frustration. Something that, on reflection, you wish you hadn’t done. Recently, I was meeting a charity organization to assist them with a fundraiser. It took me a long time to get there due to traffic, rain […]

Own Your Space front cover

What does it mean to really OWN your Space?

February 2nd, 2016 by

Recently, I had a conversation with a friend of mine who was at a launch event of a prominent artist. She was completely star struck and eventually plucked up the courage to go and greet him, well that was after her friend forced her and did the introductions on her behalf. She nervously greeted him […]

OWN Your Space

OWN your Confidence and Attitude

November 24th, 2015 by

Many of us believe that it is our accomplishments that will help us to succeed. And that is partially true. Having a track record of good work is an important factor that certainly contributes to your advancement. But projecting a sense of confidence is crucial, as well. In order to do that, you need to […]

Play like a Man, Win like a Woman

One of my best books: Play Like a Man, Win Like a Woman

November 23rd, 2015 by

Women make up almost half of today’s labour force, but in corporate America they don’t share half of the power. Only four of the Fortune 500 company CEOs are women, and it’s only been in the last few years that even half of the Fortune 500 companies have more than one female officer. A major […]

Anything You Want

One of my best books by Derek Sivers: Anything you Want: 40 Lessons for a new kind of Entrepreneur

November 23rd, 2015 by

Best known for creating CD Baby, the most popular music site for independent artists, founder Derek Sivers chronicles his “accidental” success and failures into this concise and inspiring book on how to create a multi-million dollar company by following your passion. In Anything You Want, Sivers details his journey and the lessons learned along the […]

The 4 Hour Work Week

One of my best books: The Four Hour Work Week with key highlights

November 23rd, 2015 by

Whether you’re an overworked employee or an entrepreneur trapped in your own business, The 4-Hour Workweek is the compass for a new and revolutionary world. Forget the old concept of retirement and the rest of the deferred-life plan—there is no need to wait and every reason not to. Whether your dream is escaping the rat […]

Elle Boss: Meet the 6 Finalists

September 7th, 2015 by

Tonight is the night, we announce the winner of our 2015 ELLE Boss Award in partnership with the Veuve Clicquot Business Woman Award. The award ceremony will take place at the Tsogo Sun at Hyde Park Corner in Joburg, and aims to celebrate women in business from both corporate and entrepreneurial categories. Here, we get […]

Rewire Your Time

Rewire Your Time – Women’s Health June 2013

June 4th, 2013 by

Who has time to think about goal setting when there are hilarious cat videos to be watched? Sure, we’ve all lost entire afternoons in the YouTube vortex, but too much procrastination leads to guilt. Shouldn’t you really be painting your kitchen/calling your parents/writing a novel? In fact, Women’s Health readers cited lack of time as one of their top reasons for feeling stressed. But experts […]


Beyond the Dress on 3Talk

May 28th, 2012 by

Below is a video insert from 3Talk with Nolene which was aired on 15 May 2012

Morning live

Beyond the Dress Workshop Video – SABC 2

April 3rd, 2012 by

Below is a video insert from Morning Live on SABC 2 which was aired on 27 March 2012

Lori Milner

Modern Day Woman

March 26th, 2012 by

Lori Milner calls on the women of Joburg to indulge in some “me time” You’re a wife, a mother, a sister, a girlfriend, a colleague, a boss or all of the above. The title that most often gets neglected in your long lists of identities, however, is just being yourself, and it’s exactly that sorely […]

I do and then?

September 12th, 2011 by

For some women, getting married is about the white dress, flowers and cake. But what about the next day, the next week, the lifetime together? Owner of Mobi Warehouse, a leading provider of prepaid airtime to corporate employees, Lori Milner was excited about her wedding day in April 2009. But after tying the know, she […]

That certain je ne sais quoi that French women have is self-worth

September 11th, 2011 by

Sexy, effortless style is synonymous with our continental sisters, writes HELEN GRANGE. And it has less to do with fashion or beauty than it does an innate sense of self FRENCH women, common wisdom has it, have a certain je ne sais quoi, that indefinable something. But we do know it hints not at the […]